Five Ways Divorce Made Me a Better Parent

I didn't plan to end up a divorced mom of three. My divorce devastated me, my husband and our children. Like any family facing that or any other major catastrophe, we spent much of the first year coming to terms with the left turn our lives had taken, and mourning our loss. That was then. Now, [...]

By | 2017-08-17T09:37:12+00:00 June 30th, 2017|Coparenting, Divorce|

How I Became a Blended Family Star-Seeker

I'm standing on our front walk,  shivering in the night air, dressed only in my nightie. I'm waiting for the dog to say his final goodnight to the yard, a process that involves sniffing every bush and marking his property repeatedly. Like most things with dogs and small children and the elderly, the ritual takes [...]

By | 2017-06-26T14:30:58+00:00 June 26th, 2017|Other Musings, Our Life Together, Our Story|

What You Learn When You Can’t Go Home Again

The hot pavement blisters my feet the instant I step out of the car. I always kick my sandals off about an hour into the long ride, and in my hurry to get into the house, often leave them forgotten on the floorboards. The children stream out of the car, noisy and excited, running in and around [...]

By | 2017-06-15T09:36:52+00:00 June 15th, 2017|Divorce, Other Musings, Our Story|

A Love Letter to All Stepdads (and Especially My Husband)

I see you, you know. I see you watching my sixteen year-old son, waiting for the right time to offer your help. He's at our kitchen table, hands woven through his curly hair, struggling with an advanced math problem that would be easy for you. I see you carefully weighing the value of that help with [...]

10 Things I’ve Learned About Being a Divorced Mom

10. Grief wallops you in the grocery store. You think you're safe in the frozen food aisle, or presenting to a client at work, or chaperoning a field trip with your child, but you're wrong. Grief doesn't care where you are or what you'd prefer to be doing. It arrives on its own schedule, brought on by [...]

By | 2017-08-17T09:40:02+00:00 June 6th, 2017|Coparenting, Divorce|

To The Woman Who Called Me Sanctimonious and Lustful: Thank You (Yes, Really)

Last week, I finished a client session, returned to my desk and found this letter waiting in my inbox. "Dear Kate, You may love your kids more than you hate your ex, but please, do not allow yourself to be sanctimonious about it. Some people divorce because their spouse becomes physically abusive to them or [...]

By | 2017-06-04T12:30:09+00:00 June 2nd, 2017|Other Musings|