Dreams and Schemes: Why I Abolished Resolutions

My me-first attitude took a long time to develop. I once tried to make a list of all the recommendations I'd read about how to do everything -- maintain a car, start a 401(k), nurture a relationship, pick a preschool -- so that I could be sure not to muck up my life.  Fifteen minutes [...]

By | 2016-12-29T10:32:56+00:00 December 29th, 2016|Blended Family Tips, Holidays and Traditions, Our Life Together|

Surviving the Stepdaughter War

My stepdaughter Amy is eleven, and has a war raging within her.  It surfaced this weekend. "That's not how mom makes potatoes," she told me as I slid the roasting pan into the oven before dinner. After her shower, she came downstairs, long hair dripping down her back. She held up the Wet/Dry hairbrush she'd begged for [...]

By | 2017-06-13T15:47:18+00:00 December 27th, 2016|Blended Family Tips, Coparenting, Divorce, Our Bunch, Stepparenting|

That Time I Forgot I Love My Husband

I love Gabe more than I thought it was possible to love anyone, but sometimes I forget.  I get swept up in our day-to-day life, managing the comings and goings of our tribe and making sure they're fed a vegetable every third day or so, and I forget. I forget that I'm doing all this [...]

By | 2017-03-20T09:31:01+00:00 December 23rd, 2016|Blended Family Tips, Our Life Together, Our Love Story|

How To Find Strength When Sadness Strikes

Dear Kate, I'm a single mom raising two terrific kids.   I'm having trouble finding the joy in my life.  I'm focused on my two children, but feel like there's nothing beyond that for me.    I just ended my first serious relationship after my divorce.  He wasn't ready to partner and had issues with [...]

By | 2017-03-02T13:53:44+00:00 December 21st, 2016|Ask Kate, Blended Family Tips, Divorce|

Five Reasons I Love My Ex-Husband

My ex-husband and I married on this day, nearly a hundred years ago.  I woke up on that snowy morning thinking of all the reasons I loved him, my head and heart filled with dreams and hopes for our life together. I didn't expect I'd ever wake up on this date married to another man. [...]

By | 2017-08-17T10:25:29+00:00 December 19th, 2016|Coparenting, Divorce, Our Life Together|

Remembering Christmas: Finding Magic in the Holidays

Christmas adds a special layer of crazy to our already busy days.  'Tis the season to be on the road at rush hour and driving through for dinner.  We are perpetually late to a kid activity that requires outfits we don't own and a gift for an exchange no one wants to do. Last night, [...]

By | 2016-12-19T21:47:51+00:00 December 16th, 2016|Holidays and Traditions, Our Life Together|

How To Cope With Different Parenting Styles

Dear Kate, My children’s father married in September. As their wedding approached, he asked the kids what they wanted to his new wife, and pushed them to call her "S'mom for "stepmom". I didn't (and don't still) love it and asked if there was another name we could come up with that wasn't a derivation [...]

By | 2017-08-17T10:28:29+00:00 December 14th, 2016|Ask Kate, Blended Family Tips, Coparenting, Divorce|

How We Grieve Without Losing Our Way

I spent the weekend nursing my children's wounds.  Not new wounds - although Lottie did catch her finger in a door and Caden stepped on a tack.  This weekend I nursed the old grief that surfaces every now and again. Our social media highlight reel paints a picture of fun family time spent together this [...]

By | 2017-08-17T10:29:37+00:00 December 12th, 2016|Blended Family Tips, Coparenting, Divorce|

Our Backyard Mini-Farm

We're closeted hippie farmers around these parts.  We look the Modern Family part - blended with kids galore, house in the 'burbs, and a ridiculously large SUV, but in our hearts we're out riding tractors. Gabe grew up in the country, on land his family has owned for generations.  I spent summers on my grandparents' ranch, [...]

By | 2017-03-26T20:10:01+00:00 December 8th, 2016|Our Home, Our Life Together|

Hey Jealousy, Where’s My Beachhouse?

Our friends just bought a beach house and I am so jealous I can't see straight.  I can't even talk about it without becoming instantly grouchy. It's petty and unbecoming and  true. Apparently, I desperately want a beach house. This is  surprising because until now, I've been vaguely anti-beach house.  I've ranted about maintenance hassles and [...]

By | 2017-06-13T15:48:21+00:00 December 6th, 2016|Blended Family Tips, Other Musings, Our Life Together, Our Story|